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11 october 2000

and the candidates descend upon my town

Alright! I give up!

The second presidential debate is in town, right here in spiffy little Winston-Salem. A couple of people have contacted me to see if I would be at the debate (think I could get a media pass for lionessden.com?) and one person even asked if I might be reviewing it. Wow! What faith you all must have in me! Know that I am flattered, however...

I regret that I disappoint. No, I won't be at the debate. In fact, not many people will be. What I can tell you is how a presidential debate has affected our fair city over the past week. I think I can safely say that more people are unhappy about it than are thrilled. Why? For one, it's taking place on the Wake Forest University Campus, which can be like a different city in itself. While it's certainly a place that Winston can be proud of, it is an insular academic community, and can hardly be considered representative of our town as a whole.

Many Wake Forest students have been publicly quibbling this week. Seventy-five tickets were distributed in a lottery to lucky students, who then had to undergo an extensive FBI background check and general look-see to make sure they were more debate-goer than peanut gallery. Fewer tickets were distributed to the public at large, so most of us will be looking at the telly, just like you. We do get to enjoy a few perks, however, such as:

Clean Streets! The ironic thing is, our streets are pretty darn clean to begin with. However, I was lulled to sleep last night by the National Guard Street-Cleaning Squad and their tiny scrubbing bubbles. The candidates will be happy to know that they can now eat off the street.

Traffic Jams! Yeah, "rush hour" here lasts from about 5:15 until 5:29 p.m., so we're already mapping our alternate routes to compensate for the extra twelve cars. Look busy, everyone!

VIP's only two blocks from where I live! That's right, one of them is staying at the swank hotel downtown, two blocks from my place. What does that mean? Activist Kim goes to work! I've already designed a little Wilma-sized sandwich board, addressing the issues that are important to us.
Side One: Plan on making the Supreme Court any more conservative?
Side Two: KILL PUSSYCAT, KILL, KILL!
Guess who I'm voting for.

Increased business for Krispy Kreme donuts! I mean, come on. While we're known as the headquarters for RJ Reynolds, Krispy Kreme is the corporate headquarters that'll put some delicious plump in your rump. Don't leave home without your donuts, guys!

Do I wish they would hold this thing out in the street? Of course I do. THAT'S a debate. Just gather the candidates (and I mean all of them, or at least Nader and the Natural Law Party candidate) in Corpening Plaza downtown, and have locals fire questions at them. Because I've got a lot of them.

This weekend, I read the most personally profound statement about this campaign. It was from Gloria Steinem's column this month in Ms. Magazine. She states that she "has never been so afraid before an election." And I must say that I concur. Never has so much been at stake --- for women, for environmentalists, for anyone with an overwhelming social consciousness. Yesterday, my friend and fellow AvantGo columnist Jason Pettus posted European opinions on the debates. To most of them, I say, "Amen". We must stop conducting ourselves as if we are not only the sun, but the universe itself.

As the candidates sequester themselves in the safe Wake Forest enclave tonight, I wonder how much of this city they will really see. There is too much America here to ignore.