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9 february 2001 Submit to lid. Earn fame. Lots of fame! Fortune, well... |
yep, i've had better days Well, now this was a persnickety day. I am not in Chicago. I am disappointed. I was up bright and early yesterday morning, playing with Wilma, feeding her a little extra, and indulging her a few extra hugs and kisses. Packed my bag. Worked out. Got pretty excited. Drove to the airport. Boarded the plane. Took out my emergency flight flask (which is a whole life and stuff in itself, don't ask.) Downed three Jack and Cokes in ten minutes. The flight attendant observed, wide-eyed, and then just started leaving the entire can of pop. I'm all grins. Takeoff! And bring me a pillow! The nice man next to me, who happens to be a pilot for this airline as well, is exceedingly kind to me throughout. Engages me in conversation to take my mind off airborne-ness. And to be honest, I'm totally ready. Ed the Pilot is a miracle worker. My palms have stopped sweating. Ed the Pilot and Jack Daniels have joined forces to get Kimmy off the ground. Come on, already! Takeoff! What day is it again? Our friendly pilot taxis us toward the runway, where we pause for a few minutes. I don't really know how much time has elapsed. I am beginning to forget where I was born. Ready to fly! I hear friendly pilot state over the intercom that our right engine is not starting, and that we need to taxi back to the terminal to figure out what's wrong. WRONG. WrongWrongWrong RingRingRings in my ears. Bad jet! Bad, bad jet! Where am I? Where are you taking me? I'm wearing my glasses, but they're not helping anymore. Everything is pleasantly fuzzy. Aah. Ready to fly! But the brand-new 717 Boeing is not ready to fly. I wonder if a few Jack and Cokes in the fuel tank might hit the spot for el avion. The pilot states that because this new jet is entirely computer-based, they must reboot the computer. I'm still okay. I'm a computer girl. I understand reboots. They fix things. Ed the Pilot doesn't seem alarmed. I think I just saw butterflies come out of the air vent. Woo-hoo! Self-induced onboard entertainment! We sit on the runway while they reboot. Unfortunately, it does nothing. We are de-planed. I am de-brained. Halfway up the concourse, I realize that I am EXTREMELY dizzy and nearly pass out. Damn. Must...rebook...flight. We herd up to the customer service desk, and luckily I am a priority case because I have the furthest destination with a connection. For another hour, two women work alternately on the Chicago and Orlando people. They call other airlines. I call a few friends. I try to reach Linda so we can work double-time on other airlines of our own. At last, they are able to offer me...not much. Best case scenario is that they can land me in Chicago at 6:30ish, but she also states that Chicago is extremely delayed today because of weather. Not only that, but they would be landing me during flight rush hours, and she couldn't even guarantee that there wouldn't be delays in Atlanta, where there are ALWAYS delays. So essentially, she's telling me to fly to Atlanta and take my chances with their airport crew. Now, I could have gotten a direct with American Airlines, but my airline wouldn't pay for it (700 smackers--aagh!). They insisted that I had to use this or that airline, I must make a connector, or sorry chicky, you're outta luck. I called Jason. And Shappy. And Krystal. I was sad. I was really looking forward to seeing them. I would have loved to just go up anyway, for the heck of it, but then that diminishes my chances for being able to come up and perform at another time. Gets pricey, you know? So then there's the matter of not only being disappointed, but in no condition to drive home. Frankly, I'm in no condition to walk to the snack bar. Luckily, when I've had a few, my speech isn't affected too much and I can conjure up enough respectability to handle little customer service emergencies. I just have to do it very deliberately, and slowly. My knees feel like Nerf balls. My head is still spinning. I'm not only getting to Chicago; now I'm not getting home. Grr. So I kick back and read my daily AvantGo downloads. I read my magazine. I walk around some. I drink a lot of water and coffee. Eventually, I drive home. Such is life. |
