|
2 february 2001 Submit to lid. Earn fame. Lots of fame! Fortune, well... |
readers share a whiff Thanks to all of you who wrote and offered to send Puffs Plus. No nosebleed yesterday! Hooray! Which means, of course, that my sniffer is in primo shape. Which means that I am again knocked senseless by Aromatic Arlene in the restroom at work. Ack. I am not alone, however. Or so it would seem. Wendi was the first to write in on the matter with this snippet: My friend natalie in high school always used to say "Fragrance should be discovered not announced." I think she even made buttons at one point to help stop the abuse. Maybe that's what you and your coworkers need, buttons with a little reminder to root out your culprit. Note to self : go to Office Depot, purchase button maker. Right on, Natalie! Especially cheap fragrance! I'll give you a little more leeway if it's a dee-lish scent, which was NOT the case as I stood in line behind this dude in pimp glasses and a cloud of nas-tee aftershave. I nearly crawled into a PO box. Now, Jiri has understandably little sympathy for my plight, with good reason. Kim, you women are SO naive! Try hitting an ill-ventilated men's room right after it was trashed by some pot-bellied maniac ridding himself of the rancid remains of last night's bean dip! You women have NO clue how hard it is to hold your breath when your lungs are aching and fumbling with the button on your boxers in a desperate bid to get away without feeling your nose has just had an intimate encounter with someone else's lower colon! It's not easy being male in postmodern America! Dang, Jiri, where do you work? That's just rank. An idea, though--ever heard of Beano? Leave a bottle in the restroom with a little "free samples" sign. Great stuff. Really brightens up the place. And finally, Emily wrote in. Emily, who turned 18 a few days ago (Happy Birthday!) wrote from the trenches of our public high school system: : I'm a senior in high school...I got a pocket PC for Christmas and I downloaded your page. I really enjoy reading it everyday (usually in one of my boring classes) [ed. note: right on!] . Anyway, I just wanted to make a comment about your topic on over-use of cheap perfume. I think that's pretty bad, but at least you don't have classes with a girl who doesn't wash her clothes. She's been wearing the same jeans for about 4 months & her comment on it is,"Why wash them when they are just going to get dirty again...." Now that's disgusting! Yes it is, Emily, but fear not. One of these days, she's going to have a roommate, either in college or in the workaday world. Trust me on this one. I once had such a roommate. What was that smell, all of us wondered? Oh, that was the stench of Michelle's sheets upstairs. We had to give her a polite hygiene talk. Then a month later we had to ask her to leave when we couldn't tell if a mouse died under the stairs, or Michelle stashed her laundry there. So that does it for another week in the Den. I have absolutely no plans this weekend but for a gathering this evening. Might see another movie (this week, saw Requiem for a Dream--aaagh!) Wilma and I will snooze and play tickle. See you Monday. Oh! And stay tuned next week when I come to you from Chicago! Jason Pettus and I will be in the same places with our dorky watches! Hold onto your shorts, all! |
