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2000

june 2000

00 23 june:   capitalizing on my marginal importance to the world
00 26 june:   i think taxidermy is pretty interesting
00 28 june:   i showed mom how to use a computer
00 20 june:   i need to find a new gym

july 2000

00 3 july:   i'm going to miss walter matthau
00 5 july:   i ate a big wad of cotton candy last night
00 6 july:   i bought some potato chips today
00 10 july:   i drink a lot of coffee
00 11 july:   i was really on the jerry springer show
00 13 july:   i was really on the jerry springer show, part two
00 14 july:   i need to clean out my den
00 17 july:   i've been thinking about superheroes lately
00 18 july:   the local dermatologists have made me very unhappy
00 20 july:   i went to the bookstore today
00 25 july:   twenty-four things you can live without knowing
00 27 july:   lionessden.com goes live on avantgo today. world rejoices.
00 28 july:   i purchase tabloids
00 31 july:   i'm going to be president of the united states

august 2000

00 1 august:   i'm counting down to the national poetry slam
00 2 august:   the past five years have been kind of busy
00 3 august:   welcome to the stack o' crap book club
00 7 august:   it's birthday week in my family!
00 9 august:   i had an unfortunate run-in with a postwar styling product
00 10 august:   notes and stuff
00 15 august:   32 horrifying ounces
00 16 august:   protecto, one-ply avenger
00 17 august:   i see dead country singers
00 18 august:   the mom and dad school of driving
00 21 august:   this is how i got my english degree
00 22 august:   letters from iceland
00 23 august:   letters from iceland, part two
00 24 august:   letters from iceland, the end
00 28 august:   i met wilma this weekend
00 30 august:   kelli goes florida or bust

september 2000

00 1 september:   long weekend ahoy!
00 4 september:   i watched tv this weekend
00 5 september:   raise your hand if you've had a job like this
00 7 september:   wilma makes a...um...friend
00 11 september:   i'm reading a real good book
00 12 september:   viva allergy season
00 13 september:   g'day, you freak
00 14 september:   on homesickness
00 19 september:   worst date number one, part one
00 20 september:   worst date number one, part two
00 15 september:   some guy in virginia always has some on hand
00 25 september:   in memory of pat storm
00 26 september:   more dreadful dates
00 29 september:   creepy coffeehouse guy

october 2000

00 3 october:   OSHAAAAAAAGH!
00 4 october:   hey, let's look our best on a lark
00 9 october:   take vermont forward
00 10 october:   hair and stuff
00 11 october:   and the candidates descend upon my town
00 12 october:   i held a sign and yelled
00 13 october:   life so far
00 16 october:   i had a super duper weekend
00 17 october:   sunday was good, too
00 19 october:   friday thoughts
00 24 october:   good morning
00 27 october:   testing, testing, smoke smoke smoke

november 2000

00 13 november:   ow, ow, and ow again
00 14 november:   i'm in touch with my inner winnebago owner
00 20 november:   on desperation
00 21 november:   some people earned their spot in line
00 22 november:   gobble, snooze, resdesign, snooze again
00 27 november:   he knows when you've been sleeping, he knows when you're a pain
00 28 november:   encore, books!
00 30 november:   i can't believe people get paid for this

december 2000

00 1 december:   in honor of world aids day
00 4 december:   wilma goes out on the town
00 5 december:   do people hibernate?
00 5 december:   dear santa, please bring a wheelbarrow
00 12 december:   my web provider is going downhill
00 14 december:   nice weather we're having, ain't it?
00 15 december:   grapefruit juice isn't as gross as i thought
00 19 december:   mom, two kids, and the blizzard of '78
00 20 december:   part of this nutritious holiday meal
00 21 december:   yeah, but does santa believe in you?
00 christmas:   kim and wilma, santa's biggest fans
00 26 december:   santa rests
00 28 december:   talking 'bout a resolution

2000 reviews

00 23 june:   not jerky. not chew. jerky chew.
00 30 june:   snack-sized church chow for samaritans on the go
00 5 july:   the great pie crusade
00 12 july:   the greatest post office box ever
00 19 july:   when the very best is just too much trouble
00 27 july:   who wants to view millions of naked mammal parts?
00 3 august:   "there are stars, and then there is burt reynolds"
00 10 august:   seafood sam, al, and the yelling guy across the street
00 16 august:   broke need not mean stinky
00 15 september:   a guy in virginia always has some on hand
00 5 october:   butter: does a body good
00 12 october:
  aw, shucks, let's debate
00 18 october:
  good for your soul, bad for your heart
00 17 november:
  linda's and kim's friday feast
00 7 december:
  my feet are in good hands
00 21 december:
  don't tell these people, "it's just a dog"

© kim holzer, 2000. remember that, or my mom will come get you.